Topic: Sleep "training"

Hello fellow parents!  You'd think by child 5 we'd have this figured out, but nope!

Ivy is a horrible sleeper.  I mean shes NEVER slept more then 2 hours at a time, nurses all night, co-sleeps, and will only nap if being held.  We will not CIO, and night weaning is not an option.  Real No Cry Sleep Solution, thought it was junk, its nothing more then what we do already.

Read Jay Gordon's approach yesterday, and I like it in theory.  Anyone tried it?  I know this too shall pass, but the last week I've only gotten 45 minute stretches of sleep, and it'd be nice to have longer chunks before the next is concieved.

Thanks all!

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Re: Sleep "training"

We took a step similar to the first step in his plan. After probably 11-ish, H would nurse E, then cut her off and I would go in and get her to go to sleep.  It was not pleasant. But it did work.  We never actually moved past this step, because she soon learned that if she fell asleep while nursing she wouldn't have to go to sleep by herself. And just knowing that there could be something else meant that she slept longer and better.  She went from waking (*and staying awake) multiple times a night, to sleeping from 8-2:30, waking to nurse, and staying mostly asleep in our bed for the rest of the night.  That worked for us.
We didn't truly night wean until last month, and she's still in the big bed with us from about 2:30 on (my fault, eek!). It's working for now, though I would like to get her sleeping all night in her bed, maybe in the next 6-9months or so.

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Re: Sleep "training"

I am watching this thread intently. Hoping to find some glimmers of hope, as we seem to be traveling the same path.

I will take a look at the Jay Gordon approach, as I have not heard of it yet. We were already doing everything in No Cry as well. And it seems that most no CIO  approaches don't support co-sleeping or night nursing.

Re: Sleep "training"

I haven't tried it.  I keep requesting to night wean but I am outvoted 2-1 by DH and M.  Although, we might try it soon b/c after I was so exhausted last night DH told M I was done nursing and said that they could snuggle.  M snuggled him, fell right asleep and we all got our first solid length of sleep.

I know Jessica, the author on the Leaky B@@b did this method with Smunchie in summer of 2011 and blogged extensively about it.  You could read about her experience to get an idea.

Re: Sleep "training"

I also took a stab at the Jay Gordon approach and did have some success. Then we ended up in a really bad teething spell and I resorted to nursing throughout the night once again to calm O so we were pretty much back at square one.  I know while I was in this phase it was everyone else who got to sleep and NOT me.  As long as I was nursing through the night Anna could sleep and O was peaceful and content.  It really started taking its toll on me.  Then I got pregnant and it was even more difficult to function on minimal sleep.  I had made it thus far so I had no intention of really changing anything, but O decided to wean on her own and I went with it.  So right around 20 months is when I started consistently getting longer stretches of sleep through the night.  Of course pregnancy induced insomnia and the need to constantly pee have sabotaged this, but oh well. What can you do?  Good luck with whatever you decide on.  I hope sleep is in your future smile

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6 (edited by ttc.jujubee 2013-01-11 12:23:45)

Re: Sleep "training"

I just wanted to say that since you posted this we have been trying a modified Jay Gordon approach and it has been very successful! I have had almost a week of 3-4 hour stretches of sleep twice per night. A godsend... Really. And our son seems so much happier during the day. We haven't had to ween or stop cosleeping. Our little guy is13.5 months.

Old routine:
Nurse, then rock/yoga ball bounce to sleep at 7pm
Woke up every 45-90 minutes to nurse until 5-6 am, when he was up for good

New routine:
Nurse, then rock/yoga ball bounce to sleep at 7pm
He can nurse anytime he wants before 11pm.
Between 11pm and 5am, when he wakes up to nurse I pat his bottom, snuggle him, shhhh him, sing to him. A couple of times I had to get up and rock him back down.
He can nurse all he wants from 5am on, anytime throughout the day.

A few things:
Within a few days he stopped waking up even when I came to bed. Amazing!
There were only 2-3 bad nights when he cried, but it was only for 2-3 minutes and I held him throughout. I think he was just ready for this and I had to coax him into it.
Last night he slept from 7pm to around midnight, when I let him nurse. Then slept again until 6am.
He nurses a ton more during the day, 5-6 sessions. Rather than the 2-3 sessions he was doing previously because he drank a large portion of his milk during the night.
He is much more active in his sleep, moves around the bed more, but is also more independent and puts himself back to sleep.

Re: Sleep "training"

We are having difficulty getting L to sleep through the night as well. He weaned himself at 4 months, although he still has pumped breast milk, so waking to nurse is not the problem. He goes to sleep easily around 7 p.m. but then wakes around 9:30 and continues to wake up every 45-90 minutes. We go in and replace the pacifier, rub his back, etc and he usually goes back down. This goes on for as long as we can take it, until at last we give up and put him in bed with us where we can sooth him back to sleep without getting up. I am getting tremendous pressure from my partner and both our parents to use the CIO method. I dont want to resort to this, as I cant imagine laying in bed listening to him scream for any period of time. I bought the no cry sleep method book, but like previous readers I found that we were already doing a majority of the suggested practices. Any advice is welcome.

Re: Sleep "training"

We are starting the Sleep Lady Shuffle tonight with an attempt to also night wean. We have gotten into bringing A into bed with us around midnight for the remainder of the night and she was sleeping on the boob. I was better rested than getting up every 3 hours to walk to her room but I saw the toll it is taking on her, Alayna is recently a cranky, overtired baby, the past month it has gotten worse and worse so we are going to make a commitment to trying this. It is basically sitting by the crib while she cries, some patting, occasional picking up, and I will only nurse her one time for the first 3 nights and then starting the 4th night no more nursing between 630p-6a. Nervous but I know something has to change for her to be rested and happy.

-Rebecca (Blessed mom of two beautiful, healthy girls)
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Re: Sleep "training"

We got hit with a case of the snots, so opted to wait til shes better before trying.... but i do try to just snuggle rather then nurse all night, which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't.  My biggest worry is that Tim works crazy hours, an I'm back to working full time, and I don't have the time fir us to be even more sleep deprived.  My biggies eventually slept on thier own, so I assumed she would too.  Right now her crib where she starts the night is in our room, though we're thinking of moving it to the sitting area outside of our room in the spring (its really cold there right now!).  LOL I tell myself every night "tonight I won't cave" and then in the middle of the night I'm too tired to keep my resolve!

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Need to update a ticker, Silas Anthony Jordon born Oct 11, 2013.  6th baby, so much love!

Re: Sleep "training"

Omg, this is exactly our issue right now too! Our daughter was an awesome sleeper, without the boob but our son loves the boob like a fat pug loves cake. sad I will not CIO and there seems to be little else of advice out there. The night weaning seems like maybe something we could try.

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Re: Sleep "training"

This thread is just what I need smile 

At my daughters 4 month doctor visit, i was told she is big enough to make it through the night without needing to nurse. That her night nursing was more for comfort.

I somewhat disagree.

On the days she eats well at daycare and afterwords sure maybe she has had enough to sustain herself for the
night...but often she is tired as the day goes on and doesnt nurse that great at times. It just seems like a lot to ask for her to go 10 hours and no food or comfort. Anyhoo...i have resolved to just keep feeding her every 3-4 hours...day or night...and comforting her or letting her sleep in my bed if it works. I do not like her in my bed because i am too restless and sometimes wake her up. Or she is restless and wakes me up!  But at 3am my judgement is foggy and its easier to feed and comfort her within arms reach.

I hope to try something different when she is 6 months or taking solid food.

Im also having her start the night out in her crib in her room...with hopes she will stay asleep for longer stretches, as she really does nurse with good appetite at night, so im hopeful when she no longer needs food then she will not demand it... who knows! Good luck to everyone and please keep us updated on what worked for you!

12 (edited by RW17 2013-01-16 18:32:01)

Re: Sleep "training"

We tried Jay Gordon (which basically was nightweaning-- not sure how you'd do it without nightweaning). There were 3-4 nights with lots of crying wake-ups.  It helped but we made the mistake of having me sleep in the guest bedroom for a couple of months while my partner did the soothing, and then when I rejoined the family bed we had to start over. So if you do it, keep the situation as you'll want it to continue being long-term in terms of who sleeps where.

At this point and with night weaning our child sleeps better but still does not "sleep through the night." He's 19 months old.

Re: Sleep "training"

I think doctors mean medically she does not have nutritional needs to eat during the night. But emotionally/for comfort they usually still do, and I think for hunger they often still do, much later than 4 months...


lville wrote:

This thread is just what I need smile 

At my daughters 4 month doctor visit, i was told she is big enough to make it through the night without needing to nurse. That her night nursing was more for comfort.

I somewhat disagree.

On the days she eats well at daycare and afterwords sure maybe she has had enough to sustain herself for the
night...but often she is tired as the day goes on and doesnt nurse that great at times. It just seems like a lot to ask for her to go 10 hours and no food or comfort. Anyhoo...i have resolved to just keep feeding her every 3-4 hours...day or night...and comforting her or letting her sleep in my bed if it works. I do not like her in my bed because i am too restless and sometimes wake her up. Or she is restless and wakes me up!  But at 3am my judgement is foggy and its easier to feed and comfort her within arms reach.

I hope to try something different when she is 6 months or taking solid food.

Im also having her start the night out in her crib in her room...with hopes she will stay asleep for longer stretches, as she really does nurse with good appetite at night, so im hopeful when she no longer needs food then she will not demand it... who knows! Good luck to everyone and please keep us updated on what worked for you!