I find it very interesting, to see how others handle the concept of having a donor. I may be a bit extreme here, but I am seriously considering making up a name for my donor, so the child has a person to refer to.
This is my reasoning:
I have a 5 year old adopted daughter. I adopted her through the state. I am a SMBC, so she doesn't have a dad in her life. She sees that most of her friends have dads, and asks LOTS of questions. She has never met her birth father. I met him once, on the day he surrendered his rights. Her birth mother was prostituting, and he was a client. He didn't know about her, until she was a year old. He is allowed to write to her, but never has. So she knows that he is out there, and maybe they can meet, someday.
I take the blame God approach with her. I told her that God takes a Mommy part and a Daddy part, to make a baby. But sometimes God needs another, special Mom, to raise that baby. So she has a "Mama N_", a "Daddy E_", and "Mummy".
Although, when my sister and her husband were expecting, my daughter was convinced that once they had their baby, it would live with US! She thought everyone was adopted!!!
She knows that I am planning on getting pregnant soon. God just needs to help me find a Daddy part, since we don't have one at our house.
I just think it wouldn't work, for our family, to refer to "donor". Of course, everyone who knows us will know I used a donor. I just think a name will be easier for the child and my daughter.
Was all set to use NW, but found a known donor.
2013 - 3 BFNs
2014 - 7 BFNs
2015 - 4 BFNs
2016 - Feb BFN