Topic: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

M has hit the tantrum stage head on the past few days.  The girls started at around the same age.  With them, however, they would do the fall to the ground like the world just ended thing and cry and/or yell a bit and I would talk calmly to them or just ignore it for a minute if appropriate and it would end.  The boy, however, cries and screams and kicks and flails and carries on and on and on.....and on.....about.every.little.thing.  Is it just a boy thing or what?  I know he is getting more frustrated (as are we) with his lack of words to communicate.  But H didn't say much at his age either and her tantrums weren't as bad even though they seemed bad at the time! 

My main concern is that I am not aggressive with my children or a yeller by nature, but when I was hurt with a back injury/surgery last year and then with the stress of 4 young kids, I know I didn't/don't always have the same patience each day as I used to.  I am worried I somehow taught him to act out this way.  He is a super duper sweet, loving, silly boy most of the time, but man, does he all of a sudden seem to have a bit of a temper. 

Hoping it is just a boy thing and I didn't create a hot headed boy sad

July 4, 2015

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

I think it is more frustration combined with his personality. I definitely don't think you "taught" this behavior. Unless you throw yourself around and go on and on and on?  Yeah I didn't think so. Just remember, this too shall pass (just in time for #4 to start, lol)

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

Yeah, it not a boy thing, just a personality thing! Among my kids, the sweetest, most sensitive one is the one who argues the most and has the worst tantrums. She just feels everything - including frustration - very deeply!

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

Not a boy thing, its personality.  Olivia throws tantrums like this, while Noah's style is mostly crying with a super high pitched scream thrown in.

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

It's not a boy thing -- it's his personality emerging smile    My experience with this comes from having my niece and nephew on weekends when they were babies/toddlers.  The girl (the older one) could throw epic tantrums.  In public the screaming and carrying on never went past 20-30 minutes.  If sent to her room though she could go for an hour or more.  And then if I went to check on her it would just start anew.  Her baby brother on the other hand was just precious.  I'm sure I've told this story before but I love it so you get to hear it again.  For one tantrum he flung himself on the ground and hit his head and then cried for real.  The next time he flipped out on me, he carefully lay down on the ground, and then started screaming and kicking his feet.  It was the funniest thing I ever saw!  Calming him down was a simple matter of picking him up and then giving hugs and cuddles. 

In the case of maxed-out-Max, give yourself a break.  You didn't cause this or create this behavior or precipitate it.  I suggest headphones.  For you.  To help tune out the tantrums and tune in to inner serenity!

6 (edited by insearchofadonor 2013-06-15 15:51:23)

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

Nope, not a boy thing but a personality thing, just like the previous posters have said.  smile

Zen, that story is hilarious!! big_smile

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

Another one for personality wink Out of my three, K threw the worst tantrums. Once in awhile M can come in a close second. S hardly threw tantrums at all.

Mommy to Twins plus One - donor 733

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

So far my son has been the easy, mellow, talk him out of a tantrum type, and both my girls are the kick and flail like its the end of the world types.  I think it has ore to do with personality (and possibly astrology) then gender.

Need to update a ticker, Silas Anthony Jordon born Oct 11, 2013.  6th baby, so much love!

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

Justin threw the dramatic tantrums (slowly lowered himself to the floor with a loud sigh before he really got into much).  Mostly his early tantrums were just laying on the floor saying no or being non-compliant.  Later he would just cry in frustration or throw things. 

Juliet stands ramrod straight, makes fists, and screeches at the top other lungs repeatedly.  Everyone at daycare (50 kids) knows and can hear her tantrums from anywhere in the daycare.  Nothing subtle about hers. 

Personality has a lot to do with it.   Justin has low frustration tolerance, and most of his are the result of not being able to do something.  Juliet is highly emotional, stubborn, and WANTS TO BE HEARD when wronged.

Re: Boy vs. Girl tantrums

I dunno but Lily never used to have them but since she hit 5 and school they seem to be becoming a regular along with whining in our household...I am a bit unsure of how to deal with them myself other than telling her to go have her episode in her room....

Lindsay xx