(13 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

michgirl wrote:

I don't have three but I have been thinking  A LOT about trying again. I am worried because the Dr. said I had an 83% chance of having two (or more) again. I think I could do three alone but not sure I could do FOUR!

Not sure why the doctor is telling you this. All the research I did said after spontaneously twinning you have a 1/20 chance of doing it again.

Going from two to three was hard. I know many say it's the easier of the transitions but I don't see it that way. I was very routines, structured and very active with the twins and all that seemed to go to the wayside with number three. I dont have any help though. Maybe if I did I would be so pulled thin.

Now many of you know that I really want one more, but so far haven't made any steps towards it. My heart wants a third more than I can put into words, but my brain continues to point out reasons not to. Money, time, energy, emotional/mental demands, etc.

Now if I did have a partner and didn't have all the financial and other burden on just my shoulders, my decision would probably be easier.

Mine weren't tremendously different. I had onset of symptoms earlier the second time around. The severity was worse the first time, but of course there were two babies wink

Definitely normal, but I would call your physician. You might need a blood test to make sure you haven't lost too much blood. Many women who I treat who are on long term anticoagulants will also be placed on something to stop their periods, but since this is short term, they may not see it as necessary. Drink extra fluid and don't over exert yourself.

I had some similar problems. My insurance knew a baby was coming and covered him in the hospital but once discharged he couldn't be covered until they had a social security number on file. So for the 6 to 8 weeks that it took to get a number, all the bill piled up and insurance denied them all. Luckily my ped office was somewhat familiar with this, so they were patient. Once I provided the insurance the SSN they went back and paid all the outstanding bills. Definitely call your provider.


(19 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)


M BF until 22 months and I am pretty sure that near the end he wasn't getting much milk. At that point though, it wasn't for nutrition at all. It was purely a comfort thing. When he was upset, he wanted to be at the breast. While falling asleep, he wanted the breast.

As far as feeling, I can say that my nipples were pretty much numb from the time M was a few weeks old to just recently. I never physically felt anything at the nipple during breastfeeding. I did however have an emotional response to breastfeeding. I loved the extra bonding it provided us. It was a time of day that I was forced to stop moving and avoid all other distractions giving all my attention to M.

A lot of it will depend on the child. I BF M until he was about 20 months. At that time he stopped being interested. So it was definitely child led - which in my opinion is the best way to go, if you're looking at EBF.

You shouldn't need to pump just for EBF. I pumped for the first year to keep a supply while I was at work. Once he turned one, I stopped the pumping and it didn't make a difference. Also, what you'll find, is once the child is around two, BF turns more into a comfort, nurse to sleep relationship rather than a nutrition thing. I think once M finally stopped my supply was pretty minimal and he wasn't really getting much when at the breast.


(9 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Just keep reminding yourself that what you want, and what you can have are two very separate things smile

I want baby number four more than I can put into words. But like you, money and a few other things make that very difficult right now. While my heart would start TTC tomorrow, my mind knows that it would be unfair to my existing children as well as the child I would be pregnant with. Reminding myself this, makes it easier to put TTC off awhile longer...but it doesn't take away my desire.

As a SMBC we are used to making huge sacrifices for our children...this isn't any different unfortunately wink

I recently took a week long vacation. I drove about eleven hours and it was just me and the kids. I did stay with relatives once there. It was a really nice vacation. The twins are six and M is two.

While I am a bit different, I often felt guilty with the twins. Having to let one baby fuss for a bit while tending to the other; not being able to devote all my attention to one child when they needed it, or being able to focus 100% on their successes or accomplishments. I think it's all very normal. Just another way for us mom's to apply guilt to ourselves.


(8 replies, posted in Trying to Conceive)

I tried to add you, but we have to be FB friends for me to do that. I have no problem friending you, but you may smile

If you know someone on FB that is in the group, ask them to add you

Yes, I think part is trying to figure it all out in his head, and part of it could be some manipulation. Maybe he's a bit young for the later, but I wouldn't rule it out.

The twins used to do stuff like that, and sometimes still do. When I told them they couldn't so something or punished them they would say things like 'I wish I had a dad' or similar to place guilt on me I guess. Now, they try to be smarter about it. A few months ago they said they wanted a dad because they needed a tree house. And recently I had to bring them to work and K mentioned that if they had a dad they could have stayed home. It never seems to come up if they don't want something or have other motives wink


(9 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Shanny wrote:

I found it funny (interesting???  telling??? smile) that you said you had friends "luck out" and marry later!

Nope...I am not looking nor do I ever plan on getting married smile Most SMBC friends that I have though, do want to be married. Being a single mom was plan A for me, while commonly it is plan B for others. They Lucked Out smile I think I would drop dead from shock if it ever happened to me.


(9 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

I've had a few SMBC friends luck out and marry later. Their spouses all adopted their children. In all but one case, all they had to do was produce receipts and/or medical records showing the use of donor sperm (not within a previous marriage) and they proceeded with the adoption without trouble.

One friend inseminated at home, with NW, and didn't have her receipts. She had to go through the long process of 'unknown father' where she had to put ads in the paper and such. Pretty embarrassing and drawn out for her but in the end her husband adopted her two children as well.

And as far as not being married, it shouldn't matter. In two of the cases I familiar with, they started the process before marriage.

I say just what you say...We don't have a dad in our family.

Since the twins have started school I have noticed the question was asked a few times by their classmates. The twins are very comfortable and matter of fact when answering. They same the same 'We don't have a dad' and then they move on. The good thing about 6yo is most of the time this satisfies their them, and they move on without asking more questions about it wink

Try to find an answer that you are comfortable and stick with it. When the question is asked, Aiden will look to you to see how you respond. If you stall and seem unsure about it, he may pick up on that and feel more insecure when answering himself. It's sometimes funny when K answers the question because I think she thinks people should just know. One time a doctor who was unfamiliar with our family asked K if her Daddy helped her with brushing her teeth. K looked at him with a look like this guy was the dumbest man on earth and said "Uh...we don't have a dad in our house" I think she may have even rolled her eyes at him.

If its important to you to find donor siblings, I would advertise here and on the DSR. Sometimes people won't say who they used, but if they see you looking for contact they will email you personally. Also, although it seems weird to us, many who use NWC have no idea there is an online forum smile

I look here and have a posting on the DSR. Recently a mom contacted me from the DSR and has two children using the same donor (bringing our count to 16) and her and her partner live in Australia!! They had NWC ship to them there! In our group there are 9 families (1 didn't report) and this donor was around when they limited use to 10 families max, so I know there are at least 2 other families out there that at least became pregnant using our donor.

Good luck! I hope baby comes soon.

I would tell you about my 4cm, thinned, bulging membranes and membranes being stripped, but it might discourage you wink

Yep...this year when the twins started school I had to move M behind the driver seat. Now, I drive a minivan so it wasn't a HUGE issue, but I liked being able to just peek in on M over my shoulder, where now I am unable to see him. Our school was also very specific in that this was the ONLY way to do the carpool and actually for safety reasons, you cannot walk in and pick up children because they don't want a bunch of parents coming in at once to pick up kids. Although I did move M, I actually have my kids listed at walkers (which I know is not an option for you). They are walked to the sidewalk outside their school, where I park waiting for them, and pick them up there smile And truthfully, the way our car pick up line is, it would be dangerous for a child/teacher to get to the other side of the car.

Also, at our school, if you did have special permission to come inside to pick the child up, their parents parking lot is next to the school so you would be able to avoid the drop-off lane.


(5 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

K cut her eye teeth first. She looked like a little vampire smile


(5 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

I looked at all of them and tried to find one that I liked without success. In the end I ended up getting a 'typical' babybook and just place pictures over any mention of a dad. It has worked well, I had more options and it was much cheaper smile

I saw that too but one of the people interviewed said they thought it was more related to high blood pressure and gestational diabetes which is a huge risk factor in obese moms. I am very overweight and was with both my pregnancies. Somehow I avoided PIH and GD and none of my children have any problems or suspicion of problems within the spectrum.

I lost a ton of weight when pregnant. It's not that uncommon in the first trimester to lose weight rather than gain. As long as you aren't dehydrated and you gain some weight later in the pregnancy - depending on pre baby weight - there is rarely a concern.

I have a local friend who is planning on adopting and wants to do this. She really wants to talk to someone who has also done it. If anyone wouldn't mind emailing this friend I would greatly appreciate it. Please send me your email via forum message and I will pass it along to her.


Some woman are different and I wouldn't get down yet. My mom is a woman who doesn't make any cervical change until she is in labor. She has had four labors, three have been spontaneous and none have lasted more than 6 hours. She would have been overweight as well during her pregnancies.

I on the otherhand am VERY overweight, and tend to dilate early. With the twins I was effaced and dilated to 3 at 32 weeks. With M I started dilating at 34 weeks. With neither did I go into labor.

Don't lose hope yet. I hate it when doctors discourage us needlessly. You have a little over a week left and there is lots of time for things to happen. Unless there is something going on you don't even need to discuss induction until close to 42 weeks. Good Luck!!


(21 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

So that everyone is on the same page....

Telly has already clarified, in an earlier post that was edited, that she was not there for services, but there for an education class.

Hopefully this will clear up some confusion.


(7 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Yah, that wouldn't have suckered me in wink Kids are crafty and are always looking cracks in your shield. I would definitely have said no if I wasn't feeling well. My kids are enough in that situation.

Just for the record it was not me. I was as shocked as you were that the comments were deleted. I mod several sites and on none of them are you allowed to delete comments or posts. I am very curious as to why the comments were deleted.


(15 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

I've seen profile photos change to their child wearing a big brother/sister tee, moms holding a jar of 'Prego' spaghetti sauce, pictures of positive tests, pics of US and then the general announcements.

I dont put shoes on my kids until they start walking and even then, only when outside. When M stared walking (around 11 months) he was in a 4. Now at 2yrs and some he is getting into a size 8. When they are little I really don't pay too much for their shoes. They go through them too quickly to shell out that kind of money.

Once they get a little older they stay in shoes much longer, but will still have periods where they shoot through sizes. S is now in a size one and has been for about a year. The year prior though I think he went through 4 or 5 shoes sizes. K is a size 12/13 and has been for about a year too. Right now I will pay more for shoes because they actually wear them to their potential. Also, with S I know too that if the shoes are in good shape, I can use them for M.

I rear faced the FP one for the first few months smile Worked well smile

Yes, I'm curious too on why you won't have an anatomy scan at 18-20 weeks?

Anyway to answer your question. I brought the twins to my anatomy scan. My office requires an adult be there if you bring kids, so it was perfect since my friend was coming with me. They watched for about 5 minutes and then played with eachother on the floor. They really couldn't have cared less. Was I glad I brought them, I guess, but it wasn't as special as I had played it out in my head. They were three.

For a scan at 11/12 weeks I wouldn't bother. That one is even less detailed and most likely Aiden won't have any true understanding of what he is seeing/experiencing.

Nope. I have been asked a few times where their dad is.

And from those who knew I used I donor, many asked if all three children are from the same donor. But never randomly asked about a donor.

It sounds like faulty tests. A normal hcg in a nonpregnant female us less than five. Most tests don't pick up until the hcg is greater than fifty. Sorry. This was not the result I was hoping for.

babybaby wrote:

the very next morning after seren was born, it was like i was miraculously well again.  i don't think that's typical, though.

Actually that's very typical. I had HG with both my pregnancies. With the twins, it was the worse case my OB's had ever dealt with. Within hours of the twins being born I was fine and pretty much the same thing with M.

Congrats to you onemorebaby! How perfect is this! Now, I question your sanity having two so close...but I totally understand it big_smile big_smile big_smile

There are many FB groups and other sites made to help moms in this situation. Did you ever get in touch with that mom I was talking about? She had used donated BM for all 6 of her kids and knows the ways to go about it. I found her on a local mommies site under the umbrella site themommiesnetwork.com and I fed her youngest child. It is important to find a mom with a baby the right age like others have said.

Good luck! I know how important it is for you!!

I have the opposite problem. M is in speech therapy twice a week but we're getting there smile

K is my talker. Today I had to ask her to stop for a little bit. Of course she's now six, so although she wasn't happy about it, she did stop.


(24 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

I don't have any problems with kids drinking juice. I only buy the 100% juice and let the kids drink what they want. S hardly drinks any, K at one point drank her weight in apple juice every day and M is in the middle. K was an EXTREMELY picky eater and wouldn't drink anything else. Now she drinks water more than anything else.

That said I don't introduce juice until one year. I briefly gave it to K before than because she had a problem with constipation but it didn't help so I stopped.

And oddly enough K is  my child with absolutely no issues with her teeth smile

Thats a really cute room! You did a great job!


(7 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Zen wrote:

I can't imagine making it a year without a cold or some other reason to visit but it's nice to know that vaccines are over and done with!

You will get another visit full of vaccines at either the 4 or 5 year check up depending on when Shiloh will enter school wink

And you may make it a year....S hasn't had any sick visits to the doctor since he was 3 and except for K and her $#$%## bone tumor that keeps causing trouble, she hasn't had a sick visit for almost 2 years.

Mine has asked why they don't have a dad a few times. I have always been very honest and upfront with them, as well as talk about how every family is different. I think they ask more because almost all our friends are a two parent (mom and dad) household and the few kids they know who have a single mom, have a dad that lives elsewhere.

99% of the time when they ask, I just go over again how all families are different and how they came to be. They are usually very satisfied with that answer. Once in awhile they will say they want a dad. When I probe more it's usually because they want someone to build a tree house for them or something similar to that.

I think as long as you answer openly and honestly, they may continue to ask the questions, but it won't become an issue for them.


(7 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Yep...just once a year smile

With the twins I used IUI vials. I did one ICI and one IUI.
With M I used IUI vials. I did 2 ICI's a few days apart


(10 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

I don't think I would trade my SMBC status for anything smile

All my kids were long and skinny too. Here is what I did with M (and S too as they are his clothes.) Even though they were a little big, they worked well. Sorry for including the whole announcement. It's the only thing I had uploaded


I had a bad experience too, so I won't share smile

The one thing I do remember that most doc won't warn you with is when the anesthetic moves up your body into your chest. It causes a lot of anxiety because it feels like you will lose the ability to breathe. I DID NOT like that feeling one bit. I would have felt better had I been prepared.

I don't remember the fundal massage. Hopefully yours will go without a  hitch!


(10 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

They sell cleaning wipes - like baby wipes but specifically for the pump in between use - at Babies R Us. Thats what I used. I had to pump three times a day. I would clean after the first two sessions and then just deal with the other when I got home. The wipes weren't too expensive and it worked wonders for me!

mel wrote:

I love them all so much and they're all my favorites at different times, but there is one whose personality is just like mine and we understand each other on a level I can't seem to reach with the others.

It's funny you say that because the child who I think has the personality most like mine, I think is the child that frustrates me the most smile

My three kids are all EXTREMELY different. All full siblings. The twins are very different and while growing up I would always say that they would be the perfect study subjects for nature vs nurture because obviously they had all the same experiences and exposures but S was such a stereotypical boy and K a total stereotypical girl. M is very active and risk taking like S but his stubborn personality and fierce independence mirrors K more.

All three have/had speech delays and were all very advanced in fine and gross motor skills. But I think thats the only thing I can say in common in all three.


(5 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

First, I am so glad you have an answer. There is nothing worse than doing everything and anything you can and never getting the results you should be seeing. When reading your posts, it really did sound like IGT to me, I hate that I was right.

Second, I glad you still have the desire to move forward! IGT won't be easy, but you can make it work! I have a few friends with it. Some, like the mother I donate to, just uses donated breast milk in bottles. Another uses a mixture of donated breast milk and formula and places it in a SNS so that whatever the baby drinks, there is always the bond of nursing.

If you feel you need more BTDT support, please send me a message, or email me at yfnr@aol.com. One of these moms had a really hard time emotionally with coming to terms with not being able to breastfeed, and the judgement she felt by using formula. As such she has created an online support group. I would love to put you in touch with her...if you would like.

((HUGS)) Squizzo!! You are an awesome momma and doing everything possible for your little one!!

I've seen many tiny babies in a Moby. I don't think you will have to worry. I just will repeat what others have said and make sure the head is up by your chest and not chin to chest to ensure good airway. I used the Moby from birth until about 6 months when he became too mobile and needed a sturdier wrap.


(26 replies, posted in Pregnancy and Babies)

Congrats on making the decision and being able to experience the resulting peace. I wish I was there. I wish I could come to a place where I was Okay with just three. I want another more than I can put into words but at least for me I can let my brain rule over my heart and know that right now another would be unfair to everyone. I also fear that even if I get my one more next year, that I will never feel done. I LOVE the baby stage so much that I think I will always want one  hmm