Topic: Hoping for a baby for our 5th anniversary....
All I have ever wanted was to be a mom. Nothing else really has ever been constant in my life except for that thought. I met my beautiful wife shortly after coming out in 2007. I must admit that the scariest part of realizing I was a lesbian was thinking about how much harder it was going to have a family. But I wouldn't trade my wife for anything. She is my rock and I love her more than I could ever express. Even though it will be devastating if we are never able to bring a baby into our family, I know our love will pull me through.
We were married in 2009, still being pretty young we knew we needed some time to establish our marriage and try to get our financial house in order before we started TTC. While our finances still continue to be a bit worrisome, we're in a much better place than we were.
We started our journey to parenthood in 2012. I have to say part of me thought we were going to be that magical couple that got pregnant our first try. Needless to say we did not. We couldn't afford more than 3 tries that year so we waited to try again in 2013. 2013 came and went and after more tries, nada.
My heart breaks a little every time I hear the news that one of my friends or family members is pregnant. While of course I am happy for them, it's hard to be confronted with monthly facebook pictures of positive pregnancy tests and ultrasound photos. But then I have to remember, that I don't know what journey that associates of mine have been on in trying to conceive, maybe they had only tried a time or two, but maybe they are like me, anxiously waiting for their dreams to come true.
I was diagnosed with PCOS several years ago, and have been on Glumetza for about 2 years now which has helped me become more regular. This time around we switched everything, doctors, sperm bank, donor the works. My old doctor had me on 100mg of Clomid days 5-9, this doctor has me on days 3-7 to try to make me ovulate earlier as it is not untypical for me to not ovulate until days 22-30.
I'm trying to remain calm, it's funny because my other cycles I was a wreak from the very beginning. I haven't really thought much about this one until today. I don't know if part of me has resolved myself to the fact that I might not get pregnant or whether I'm just more "zen" about this time. I don't know, I just hope that this is our year. We will celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary next month and I can't think of a better gift.
IUI #1- 07/12-BFN, IUI #2 08/12-BFN, ICI at home 10/12- BFN, Back to Back IUI #3 08/13-BFN, IUI #4 09/13-BFN, IUI #5 03/14- BFN, IUI #6 05/14- BFN, IUI #7 06/14-BFN
KD-10/14-BFN KD-12/14-BFN IUI #8 3/15 BFN, IUI #9 4/15 BFN, IUI #10 6/17 BFN
Potential Adoptive Parents- Baby Due November 2017!
IUI #8 04/15- BFN